Yes you heard it here first!
According to a spokesman for the Zimbabwean government Morgan Tsvangirai ruthlessly attacked police.
An eye witness who did not wish to be murdered named said he saw Mr Tsvangirai head but a police mans truncheon several times. A large gentleman stood directly behind explained "It's a devil of a job to clean the blood off a truncheon after someone has head butted it repeatedly"
Meanwhile the Chief of Harare's Police complained about agitators. "They cause immense damage by constantly throwing themselves down stairs, spattering blood as they go. The cleaning bill is horrific. When you add that to the damage they do to truncheons by ruthlessly head butting them it seriously affects our budgets!"
Meanwhile in other news, there are rumors that Muhammad Saeed al-Sahhaf has been approached to act as spokesman for the government of Zimbabwe to lend it much needed credibility.
The BBC has this obviously biased report here.
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